Sunday, September 27, 2009
Saturday, September 19, 2009
i met kathy in 6th grade. we had a few classes together, but our main bond was band. she was an insane french horn player, and i was (by 6th grade standards) a ridiculous tenor sax player. throughout middle school angst, boys, girls, homework, science fairs, parties, band concerts, older siblings, annoying parents, and late night phone calls, we made it to high school in one piece. new characters entered our lives, but we maintained our bond and late night phone calls. "who's cute/fun/ugly in your classes?" again, we still had band in common. again, new characters entered our lives. one character who entered my life was kyle. kyle and i were introduced at some point during my sophomore year. kyle was a senior at another high school. he wasn't in band or choir, but his friends were, and that was enough for him. he was tall, lanky, and hilarious. he smoked marlboro lights, which i abhored/admired. he drove a black nissan stylus, the only one in evansville. he used to listen to master p which was awesome because my mom wouldn't let me. we became great friends. we hung out almost everyday, but i don't remember what we did. he was definitely the first person i watched south park with. i introduced my friend kyle to my best friend kathy in 1998, and the next thing i knew, i was in their wedding in summer 2003. our lives took different paths, but we always stayed in touch. i talked to kyle earlier this summer when i called kathy. i talked to kathy last week on facebook about some bullshit.
i checked my facebook email tuesday night, and i got an email from kathy's aunt that said that kyle had been in a car wreck and was killed by the driver of the other car who was running from the police while under the influence of alcohol and pot. he killed my friend and showed no remorse. he left my friend widowed at 27. he left two young boys fatherless, and one of them will probably have no memory of his father. he'll never remember how funny his father is or how much his father loved them and their mother.
this week has been difficult. i've been internalizing my pain. i'm not looking for a sympathy party, but it's hard to be away from your friends and family when tragedy strikes. it's not my intention to be dramatic, but i can't ignore my pain. i can't avoid my hurt feelings. i just need to vent. that's why jermainia exists.